23 7 / 2013

"LOVES TO BE OUTSIDE AS MUCH AS I CAN IN THE SUMMER AND MOSTLY INSIDE IN THE WINTER. ALSO LOVE TO STAY INSIDE TOO FROM TIME TO TIME ALSO."

Because she’s mostly agoraphobic, from time to time.

23 7 / 2013

"And on my first date I would love to meet somewhere in the wilderness and chat until the sun comes up…"

There’s no way meeting a stranger at night in the remote wilderness will end in homicide.

01 1 / 2013

"My goals are to open and non profit youth club for trouble teens as well some dat near future open up a night club as well."

Here’s some free business advice: Open the youth center and night club under the same roof and structure it as a non-profit. You’re welcome.

01 1 / 2013

"My family currently consists of 3 dogs, 3 cats, 2 ferrets, 3 hamsters, 2 birds and some fish—- 2 wonderful kiddos and a mama who lives upstairs from me.. so if you dont like animals I will venture to guess that a relationship will probably not work out … :)"

Are the kids and mother kept in cages, too?

01 1 / 2013

"…dont wast my time becaues i dont wast ur time im looking for someone that i can get 2 know and spend my time with and start a relationship with and wants for my heart so if you can do that ..that cool holler at me if u are serious and one more thing i dont have a car or a driver license that a long story ."

Three DUIs are a long story. She’ll tell me all about it over dinner some time. I’m driving.

01 1 / 2013

"I’m looking for a prince to come on a white stallion to whisk me away… Maybe to a movie or dinner or something. If you think you interested please let me know."

Last I checked, horses aren’t allowed inside movie¬†theaters. But I can call ahead and ask.

04 12 / 2012

"…maybe I would take u out to see my dads farm, cause I think its fun there…..and a golf cart to drive around"

Sounds too intense for a first date. I’m out.

03 12 / 2012

"Want a man that is not goin to go to jail. Or have baby mama drama. Looking to start into friends first and hang out and then into a relationship. I am looking for a man that has not been to prison."

She doesn’t want anyone on their way to jail, or ex-convicts. But I bet there’s room in her heart for current inmates…

03 12 / 2012

"I’ve lived in Eldora all of my life and feel the dating pool is ‘slim pickens’."

Are they related to T. Boone Pickens?

12 9 / 2012

"I WISH TO ON MY ON BUSINESS SOMEDAY I LIKE TO SING TO THATS BEEN DREAM"

Thankfully, entrepreneurs and business on-ers don’t need to pass a spelling test.

12 9 / 2012

"I WOULD LIKE TO BE TAKING OUT TO DINNER AFTER DINNER GO DANCING TO SOME OLD SKOOL MUSIC"

Two dinners in one night? I’ll pay for the first one, but that’s all.

13 8 / 2012

"I aldo love to fish and be outdoors but I’m always willing to try new things life should be lived one day at a time I think so and not try and make all these plans it just gets too messy I think soo I would love to meet someone who I can show all the good things I have to offer I’m tired of being used n lied to"

Take a breath. What is this, a Bret Easton Ellis novel?

13 8 / 2012

"NOT MUCH INTO THE BAR SCENERY."

If I take this one home, I’d better take down all those scenic portraits of bars first.

13 8 / 2012

"I’m trying to make friends here in cedar rapids. I currently live in marshalltown Hit me up"

So you’ve cloned yourself?

13 8 / 2012

"First off I’m NOT a size 2, 8 or 12 and probably will never be but I have a Big Heart made of gold that I wear on my shoulder"

Ahem, the human heart belongs in the chest cavity.